


Cesspool of love

by SelfawareShipper



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Disapproving Brother, Disney, Dom/sub Undertones, Exhibitionism, Fluff, Human AU, M/M, Marriage, Smut, Trash boys in love, Worried Roman
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-07
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2020-08-11 12:30:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20153617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SelfawareShipper/pseuds/SelfawareShipper
Summary: For most of his life deceit had been sure he was some kind of sociopath. And is completely baffled when he finds himself deeply in love with a disaster like Remus.





	1. You're invited!

**Author's Note:**

> Title from mother mothers ”cesspool of love”. I only took the title and other than that it has nothing to do with the story. But Still it's a very good song, would recommend.

No one could say roman was a bad brother. He had tried his hardest to give Remus the best life possible. And sure he might not have been the perfect guardian, but their parents had basically abandoned them the day he turned 18. Leaving him to raise Remus on his own. He really couldn't have been expected to know how to raise a rambunctious child. Remus hadn't been a bad kid really, just a little strange. It wasn't until he met Deceit that it all went downhill. 

Deceit was the son of a multimillionaire, the kind of rich roman had only ever seen in movies. It had always been a little shooking to him that a kid raised like that would flock so closely to poor messy Remus, but he’d always suspected it was just a way to rebel against his father. With Deceit, Remus grew more and more rebellious in general, going from ditzy weirdo to malicious freak in a matter of months. He had never been a good student but after that, his grades dropped, barely enough to pass. Until the middle of senior year, deceits father died and his son inherited everything. The day after the funeral Remus dropped out of school and moved in with Deceit.

In the back of his mind roman was just waiting until the day Remus appears at his doorstep with his bags to tell him that deceit has finally got bored with him. Instead, three years later he got an envelope containing glitter and a card that said ”you're invited to the wedding of Remus Sanders and Dolion Phineas” across the front in fine calligraphy. Remus was getting married, married to someone Roman was only just now learning the real name of, for the years he'd known him ’Dolion’ had refused to give him any name over then Deceit. The whole time he's known deceit he's been a cruel, calculated manipulator, and a practiced chronic liar, and he was marrying his brother. 

It took almost an hour for Roman to calm down enough to be able to actually call them without having an outburst. Though he wasn't so sure he'd be able to maintain self-control when he heard Deceits slick purring voice come over the phone.

”can I help you?” he asked, Roman took a hard breath through his nose.

”what are you playing at Deceit?” he asked in almost a growl. 

”your going to have to be a little more specific.” He said.

”the wedding invitation. Is his some sort of joke? Are you two fucking with me?” Roman said. Hoping that Deceit would just laugh and tell him that this was just some dumb prank to freak him out and an excuse to send him a glitter bomb.

”oh good, you got it. I'm afraid, not roman, me and Remus will be married in the fall.” Deceit said casually and Romans mouth went dry.

“I stopped trying to fix all of Remus’s mistakes years ago, so I kept my mouth shut about you two, but this is too far. What’s your fucking plan with him? How could this possibly benefit you Dolion.” Roman accused, glad he finally had Deceits real name to add some weight behind it. 

“Shit, I told them to scribble out my name on your invitation. Did you at least get the glitter?” He asked. Roman glanced over at the scattering of fine green glitter now stuck deep in his carpet. He just huffed, and that seemed to be enough for deceit, who laughed happily. “Oh good, Remus would have been devastated if it hadn’t been at least a mild inconvenience.”

“Answer my question! What’s your plan? Why bother going this far?” Roman asked in frustration. There was a long pause after that. 

“I’m going to be honest with you.” deceit sighed. 

“Sure you are.” Roman snorted bitterly. 

“I don’t just lie for no reason, I lie for my own goals. Here honestly will serve them much better.” deceit said, voice like he was explaining something to a child. ” I don't have a plan.”

“Bullshit!” Roman growled. 

“I know, I know, it’s as confusing to me as it is to you. But I want you to think through this. What reason could I have for keeping him around? My family hates him, he’s a pockmark on my reputation, a near-constant liability, and one of the most annoying people I have ever met. Not a day goes by where I don’t think about how he’s the worst thing that ever happened to me.” Deceit said, and Roman spluttered, utterly shocked to hear his brother talked about like that, even if it was all true. 

“how dare you sa-“ Roman started.

“Oh calm down, he’s proud of the way he ruins my life.” Deceit cut in. “And despite all these facts I am in love with him. Can you think about how crazy that is for me? When he said yes to my proposal I cried. I didn’t even cry at my own father's funeral.” Deceit ranted, Sounding like he was also getting frustrated. “So Roman, no, I don’t have any plan, I’m marrying for love, and that’s fucking horrifying.” He finished. There was another long pause as Roman processed everything that had just been said to him. It all sounded convincing, but he knew deceit, has known him for years. 

“I don’t believe you.” He said finally, And deceit laughed.

”your right, I’m using him for sex. I’m also counting this as you rsvp, it a destination wedding in Hawaii so you should get your information about the plane tickets and hotel when the date grows nearer. All on us of course, I know money is a problem for you.” Deceit said simply, then hung up. Leaving Roman confused and angry.  
—-  
“I’d hope you were using me for sex and not someone else,” Remus said when Deceit hung up the phone. Shifting up on his elbows to better look at him. 

“I’m doing that too.” Deceit lied, knowing Remus would know it to be a lie.

“If you are can I film it at least?” Remus asked, and Deceit laughed, moving up to kiss Remus.

”your brother RSVPed.” Deceit said. 

“I heard. He seemed to take the news about as well as I thought he would.” Remus shrugged. 

“He’s just looking out for you.” Deceit reasoned. In many ways, he had respect for Roman, mostly because Roman cared about Remus.

“Maybe. I think he’s just jealous I’m getting married before him.” Remus said. 

“I am amazing, anyone would be jealous.” Deceit agreed, Remus rolled his eyes. 

“Conceded.” he laughed.

“That’s a big word for you. What should we do today my dear?” Deceit asked, reaching up to brush the hair out of Remus's face, letting his hand rest on his cheek. Remus paused to think for a second.

“We should fuck in an amusement park.” He said finally like it was a great idea. 

“You are a fucking idiot.” Deceit sighed. “Universal or Disney?”


	2. Cinderella suite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And then they fuck in an amusement park.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is just smut that's it.

”This isn't exactly what I had in mind.” Remus said looking around, he hadn't even really believed the Cinderella suite existed, but here he was.

”What exactly did you think we were going to do?” deceit asked, leaning against the doorway, watching Remus as he wandered around the room. 

”i’d don't know, a handy in a dark ride? Maybe a quicky in an Epcot bathroom. ” Remus shrugged. 

”I own the company now, if I get caught it won't just be ”teen caught with his cock out at Disneyland” it'll be ”CEO caught with his cock out at Disneyland” you see how much worse that is.” Deceit rolled his eyes.

”We’d just have to not get caught.” Remus grinned. 

”I get you into the most sought after and exclusive place in the whole park and you want to fuck in an Epcot bathroom? You know what it took to get this on such short notice.” deceit scoffed. 

”Wouldn't have taken any effort to do my plan.” Remus muttered. 

”Oh, of course, I'm sooooo sorry. I cashed a debt with someone very influential, a debt that could have been used later to a much greater benefit. But I thought It’d be better spent on something for my love. But stupid me, I failed again.” Deceit sighed dramatically.

”I didn't mean it like that.” Remus squawked.

”No, no, you’re right. I don't know why you even bother staying with a failure like me.” deceit said mournfully. 

”Were engaged, you can't play these games with me anymore, it's not fair!” Remus huffed, stomping his feet. It took all of Deceits willpower not to smile at the cute little pout on his face. 

”Seems I've only messed up more. I really should just leave shouldn't I.” Deceits said, making a big show of turning away and starting toward his bag.

”DeeDee, stop! I'm sorry.” Remus whined. Deceit stopped in his tracks. 

”What was that?” he asked. Remus pouted again, crossing his arms and puffing out his cheeks. 

”I said I was sorry.” He muttered, kicking his feet. The sad look on Deceits face disappeared, replaced with a grin. 

”See, was that so hard?” Deceit purred, walking over to wrap his arms around Remus's waist. ”and you can't honestly tell me this room isn't beautiful.”

”It’s fucking gorgeous, I used to dream of staying up here when I was a kid.” Remus admitted, smiling a little. ”I was just looking for something a bit more thrilling you know.” 

”thrilling huh? Oh, I can do thrilling.” Deceit said. Then pulled Remus into a kiss that quickly turned fevered. Enthusiast and rough until soon why we're both panting, clothes cast aside quickly. Remus didn't even noticed he was being backed up until he's back hit the cold glass. ”hows this?” Deceit whispers in his ear, taking a second bite the lobe before pulling away and suddenly flipping Remus. 

He found himself pressed flush against a window looking out over the park, hundreds of people walking around below them. Remus groaned, making deceit laugh darkly. Pressing against his back and starting to kiss across the neck.

”Like the view?” Deceit asked, nipping at his shoulder.

”Fuck yes.” Remus moaned. Pressing his pulms against the glass. Deceit grinned against his neck, hand lazily wrapping around his lovers cock, giving a few lazy strokes before pulling away.

”I’ll be back in a moment my love.” he whispered into Remus's ear then reached up then pressed his hands into the back of Remus’s, holding him to the window. ”Don't move.” it was said with the same sugary purr as everything else but the way deceits nails pressed into the back of his hand told him that this was definitely a command.

”Yeah, sure, just hurry up.” Remus groaned, desperate the hands-on him again. Deceit walked away casually. Taking much longer then he needs to go through his bags. Leaving Remus with time to really focus on his situation. He was naked and panting, pressed against a window looking out over a massive crowd. He wasn't sure if you could see through the windows from all the way down there but he really really hoped they could. He huffed, wishing he could start touching himself or something. But for how much fun he knew punishment would be, for now, he just wanted to ride out whatever Dolion has planned for him. There was plenty of time to misbehave later.

“There’s my good boy.” Deceit said happily when he returned to see Remus in the exact same position.

“Finally.” Remus groaned, slumping forwards against the glass.

“Patients Is a virtue.” Deceit hummed as he walked up behind Remus again, running a hand up his spine, resting it on the back of his neck lightly. “Yours will be rewarded.” He promised. Then there was the familiar sound of a cap popping off a bottle of lube and Remus grinned wide, arching back. 

“God yes.” He sighed when he felt slick fingers against him, pressing in with practiced ease. the hand on the back of his neck pushed forward, pressing his face into the glass. Remus just panted, pushing back as one finger became two, then three. Deceit took his time, kissing and biting his way across His lover's shoulders as he worked. Until Remus’s desperate moans filled the room.

“Whore.” Deceit muttered so adoringly it sounded like a compliment. Remus nodded in agreement. 

“Are-are you going to actually fuck me at some point?” Remus asked, barely able to get his words out between moans. Deceit growled, shoving him hard into the window, hard enough that in the back of his mind Remus was worried it was going to crack. Which would be extremely funny. Watching Dolion have to try and explain how they broke a window to Disney staff, he sincerely hoped it would happen. 

“Remember your manors, my dear.” Deceit said, pulling his fingers out but making no move to replace them with anything else. Remus groaned at the loss. A thousand shitty things he could say just to piss deceit off crossed his mind, but ultimately he was too far gone to play that game.

“P-please… fuck me. Sir.” He said, adding that last bit at the end just so he could feel the way it made Deceit shiver. Then in one swift motion Deceit pushed into him. knowing just how he liked it, he didn’t give Remus time to adjust. Starting slow deep thrusts. Leaving Remus shouting so loud he had to cover his mouth with his hand. The other looping around to stroke Remus as he fucked him.

“Do you think We’ve ruined any poor family’s vacation yet?” Deceit asked, and Remus groaned. “Bet plenty of people are enjoying the show. You're a real performe.” He sniggered as he picked up his pace. Remus babbled nonsensically Into the hand on his mouth. Staring out into the crowd as he was fucked. Thrust growing quicker, the hand on his cock matching the pace. Until soon he was biting down hard into the soft flesh of Deceits hand, and coming hard. Deceit moved quickly to hold Remus up as he went limp, moving to lay him down on his back on the bed. Hitching up his legs deceit carefully slipped back into him. Making Remus moan softly before he reached up and grabbed deceits face, pulling Deceit into a slow kissed as he fucked him to finish. 

“I have to admit, that was better than a quicky in the bathroom,” Remus said after they caught their breath. 

“I fucking told you.” Deceit laughed, sliding off of Remus. Who hummed happily, surging forward to cuddle close to Deceit.

“You're a smart guy.” He said, rubbing his face into Deceits chest.

“We’re gross, we should shower.” Deceit murmured, running his hands through Remus’s sweat-damp hair. Remus just shrugged.

“I think we’re fine.” He said.

“Of course you do, you're always gross.” Deceit sighed. 

“I am not, it's just Definitely not worth letting go of you,” Remus said, hugging closer to him, kissing him lightly.

“They have one of those massive bathtubs, the kind we could both fit in.” Deceit said, and that got Remus’s attention. 

“The kind with the jets?” He asked a little excitedly.

“I think so.” Deceit nodded. Remus stood quickly, almost skipping off to the bathroom. Deceit smiled, watching him go. Before slowly standing and following after him. 

They had this room for two more days, and he knew they were going to make the most of it.


	3. Dear brother

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the wait! Been super busy. Shouldn't be nearly as long for the next chapter. 
> 
> Enjoy

The day of the wedding approached much faster than Roman wanted it to. At least once a day he thought about just canceling. even getting to the point of calling Remus more than once before chickening out at the last moments. What kind of brother would he be if he didn't show up to what was meant to be the happiest day of Remus’s life? So he was just going to have to grit his teeth and bear it. 

Luckily he was allowed to bring a plus one so at least he’d have a lifeline. Normally he’d bring Patton, you can't get much better emotional support then Patton. but Patton and Virgil were starting to get rather serious and he just knew if he invited him hed just end up paying the extra airfare and hotel fees to bring Virgil to. Roman definitely didn't want to be dealing with any more shitty 20-year-olds then he had to. Besides, he knew Virgil was once friends with his brother and also knew they had a falling out. Roman was still above trying to sabotage his own brother's wedding and Virgil showing up would inevitably be more trouble than it was worth. Thomas, being there cousin, was already invited. So that left him with only one option, Logan. 

Logan definitely wasn't the wedding type, he didn't have a romantic bone in his body, but anyone would enjoy a free trip to Hawaii. And honestly Roman thinks the presence of someone as emotionally distant from it all as Logan will be comforting.

He woke up early for the flight, meeting Logan, Thomas and his plus one Joan at the air port. Thomas and joan we're almost buzzing with excitement. Roman tried to Match there enthusiasm. 

Dolion had opted on buying them first-class tickets, which was both incredibly nice and infuriating for Roman. Any time Deceit spent money on him Roman felt like he now owed him a favor or something, And Dolion was the last person on earth he wanted to owe. But flying economy for ten hours sounded like hell so he’s definitely not complaining.

The wedding was happening on Molokai, not the main island. So the airport they landed at was extremely small, Only three terminals. when they got to the lobby it wasn’t at all hard to find Remus. Despite not being able to see his face at all, roman imagined there’s just about no one else In The world he’d find bent over digging through a trash can in an airport while wearing what appeared to be an old tattered wedding dress, dyed a deep shade of green and black. 

For a moment roman thought about just leaving, he'd rather not have the few people milling about the lobby see him interact with that. But before he could think of a reasonable excuse to turn tail, Joan saw Remus as well.

“Remus!” They loudly announced, jogging over to him. Remus pulled himself out of the trashcan, and already half-eaten and browning apple hanging out of his mouth. Remus spat the disgusting Apple into his hand and ran up to hug Joan. 

“What uh… were you looking for in there?” Thomas asked, already clearly a little nervous. As he always was around Remus. Out of all of them, Joan was the only one that really got along with his brother. 

“Lunch! You wouldn’t believe the stuff people throw away.” He said and took a big bite of the Apple, Roman gagged.

“Aren’t you getting married to a millionaire? pretty sure you don’t need to be eating out of the garbage.” Joan asked with a laugh. 

“Billionaire. The company’s been growing since he took over.” Remus said proudly. “And that doesn’t mean I have to be wasteful.” He finished, crossing his arms. 

“Around $165 billion dollars of good food gets thrown away every year in America alone,” Logan said, looking as though he'd only tuned into the conversation long enough to give that fact and then tuned right back out.

“See! Exactly. That’s fucked up, nothing wrong with trash food.” Remus said.

“Agree to disagree, freak,” Roman muttered bitterly. Remus ether didn't hear him or just choose it ignore it. Which Roman was glad for. They had basically lived off of dumpster diving grocery stores when their parents first abandoned them, and Roman spent his life trying to get as far from that as he possibly could. He would rather not have Remus being any of that awful past up just to win a minor argument.

“You're looking fucking good by the way. That dress is crazy.” Joan said Remus smiled brightly.

“Right! I found it in the junkyard. Some sowing and dyeing later and boom even better than New .” Remus said, giving a little spin, Roman could see little bits of dirt fly off is he did and he wrinkled his nose in disgust. 

“Isn’t it bad luck to see the wedding dress before the wedding?” Thomas said. 

“Oh, I’m not wearing this for the wedding. Deceit wanted something a bit more… traditional.” Remus shrugged.

“He wouldn’t let you wear a dress,” Joan said, sounding protective like they were about to go start a fight with Deceit depending on the answer.

“no no, its not that, it’s worse, he wouldn’t let me wear something I found. Do you know how much a suit costs, I don’t know why he insists on using his money for things I can just find.” Remus complained. 

“That’s the rich for you” Thomas laughed.

“Eat the rich,” Joan added helpfully.

“Oh trust me, I do,” Remus smirked. Joan laughed, Thomas just looked a bit uncomfortable and Logan very clearly wasn’t listening. 

“Anyway. Shouldn’t we be heading to the hotel? We do have a check-in time.” Roman said, trying to change the subject Remus jumped, looking like he somehow only just noticed Roman was there. Then Ran up and put his arm around his brother's shoulders, kissing him on the top of the head overdramatically. 

“Right! The cars waiting for us!” He said excitedly. Skipping off though the airport, leading them all out into the sweltering heat of the Hawaiin sun. Where a gleaming black luxury SUV was parked, a driver sitting patiently in the front seat. Happily Remus skipped around the car, slipping himself into the passenger seat. The rest of them getting into back.

It wasn't a very long car ride In the front seat, Remus chattered the whole time about whatever came to his head. Joan and Thomas holding most of the other side of the conversation. Roman just stared out the window, trying to Will himself in to fully ignoring his brother. Instead just focusing on his beautiful surroundings. 

“There it is!” Remus said happily, pointing out his window. In front of them could they saw the beach, a series of adorable beach bungalows on the sand, connected by wood walkways to a larger central building. Palm trees and flowers dotted across the grounds. It was picturesque, an island resort off a postcard.

“Wow, this place is beautiful,” Thomas said.

“we reserved basically the whole place for the weekend. It’s a private beach, so well have it all to himself. There are caterers and bartender on staff, the whole shebang.” Remus explained casually. Roman clenched his fists, and ground his teeth. For how annoying it was to watch Remus dig through trash it was a million times worse to see someone like him so casually talk about his fantastic wealth. But the resort was beautiful, Roman tried to focus on that instead. 

The car pulled up to the main building while Remus was talking. Stopping in front of the entrance. While Remus was looking back at all of them his door was suddenly thrown open. A hand grabbing him by the back of the dress and pulling him from the car, snaking Remus squeal in shock. Quickly Roman followed him out, going from concerned to annoyed when he saw Remus wrapped in Deceits arms, giggling. 

“You asshole! I thought I was being kidnapped.” Remus laughed, softly slapping deceits arm. 

“Maybe you still are.” Deceit said back, leaning in and kissing Remus. Roman rolled his eyes, looking at anything but his brother.

When they separated Deceit gave them each a cold glance. Someone had managed to convince him to wear an eyepatch over his ruined, foggy right eye. Deceit rarely covered it, enjoying the intimidating edge it gave him. But even without it, the look made Roman uncomfortable. He never liked being around Deceit. The coldness in his eye never left even when he smiled at them. 

“Great to see you all.” He said happily. Shaking Thomas and Logan’s hand and hugging Joan. He didn’t bother to sort of gesture like that with Roman.

“You too. This place is amazing!” Thomas said, glancing around.

“Only the best for soon to be family.” Deceit said warmly. “You all must be exhausted from the trip. My assistant, Remy, will show you to your rooms.” He said. Roman hadn't even noticed the man behind them. He was probably around the same age as deceit and Remus, maybe a little older. Tall and tan with bleach-blond hair and a look on his face that just screamed disinterest. Remy huffed, sliding his phone In his pocket and stepped forward. 

“Fine.” The man, Remy, said, sounding very put out. Deceit just rolled his eyes, grabbing Remus by the hip and starting to walk away.

“Bye!” Remus called behind his shoulder. And then they disappeared inside the main building. Remy just started walking in the opposite direction, getting a yard or two away before realizing no one was following him. He clicked his tongue in annoyance.

“You all coming or?” He scoffed. 

“Oh… uh, sorry?” Thomas said sheepishly. Glancing awkwardly at the rest of them before rushing up to Remy, Joan in tow. 

“Charming,” Roman muttered, following behind with Logan as they were led away.


	4. The Wedding speech

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! I have the rest of the fic all written out to and plan to release over the next few days. Hope you enjoy!

Roman should be happy; he knows that. He just walked his brother down the aisle; he raised Remus like he was his son. Roman should be overjoyed. Instead, he was just angry. It was all just so fucking perfect, a wedding out of a rom-com. Crowds of happy onlookers watching through heartfelt I do’s shared with a beautiful, wealthy man, the promise of a life of love cradled in the lap of luxury. It was everything Romans wanted since he was old enough to want, and it was all Remus’s. 

What had Remus done to deserve any of it? He’d never worked for anything. Not a job, not school, he’s a high school drop out for fuck's sake. It’s not like his personality was doing it for him, or his looks, he could barely even bath himself. No, Remus got to be a lazy, cruel, idiot, then just get his happily ever after handed to him on a silver platter.

The worst part about it all is he knew Remus didn’t care. Knew Remus would have been just as happy if this wedding took place in an alley, or if he was living out of a car. He'd have have been just as comfortable in his ruined wedding dress saying his vows to rats and bugs as he is in this waking dream. So why should he get it? 

Roman hoped that No one noticed his face wrinkle up in disgust when they kissed. Or the absolute misery he gave off as he clapped for them. It had been a mistake coming here.

As soon as the ceremony ended, and the reception began Roman started to hunt the open bar. At first wine, then cocktails, and by the end of the night shots. He kept taking the shots with people, acting like he was celebrating with them to disguise that he’s just deliberately getting drunk at his brother's wedding. 

It just all felt so unfair. Roman had worked his whole life, fought and clawed every moment to get where he is. Middle class and lonely doing work he’s got no passion for, but it was better than where he’d started, he had been proud of himself. Then dumb awful Remus spread his legs for the right psychopath and gets to live a fairytale life. It was all a joke, and he was the butt of it.

His drunken grumbling was disturbed by Dolion’s slimy, smooth voice coming over the speakers. 

“Now that we’re all fed and happy. I believe it’s time for the speeches!” He announced from the stage. Roman had completely forgotten… he’d thought it would be at the start of the night when he was still sober enough to be coherent but hours had passed, and he’d assumed it just wasn’t happening. 

the first woman stumbled on to stage and announced herself to be Dolions mother. As her speech went on, her already slurred words quickly became emotional, and soon she was happy sobbing her way through a genuinely incomprehensible speech. At there table, Remus was doing a horrible job concealing laughter, looking overjoyed at the embarrassing display. That’s when Roman realized why the speeches were starting so late.

They had deliberately waited until they were all drunk, a cruel bid to force friends and family to humiliate themselves on stage for the couple's amusement. A hot spike of anger went through Roman, only building through the next two speeches. When it was his turn, his hands were balled to fists, and his teeth grittted.

He’d planned on still giving his written speech, wanting not to provide them with the satisfaction of fucking up. But the second he got on stage, and his eyes fell on the couple, his speech disappeared from his mind. Remus manic grin, so excited to see his embarrassment he could barely even contain it, clinging happily to deceit, who was looking at him with that smug cold look he always wore. Like he knows just what you were about to do because he’s been manipulating you here from the start. Like he was the smartest man in the world. Roman wanted to turn it back on them.

“Some wedding, huh. I mean, this place is just beautiful, isn’t it? If you asked me to write a list of people I thought least deserved something like this, these two would be on the top. Fucking monsters the both of them.” He started, some of the crowd laughed, mostly awkwardly. Remus laughed loudest, grinning a bright wicked grin, he was entertained. it made Roman see red. “Lucky for you all you'll get to enjoy it again in a year or two when Dolion finds another stupid whore to manipulate. No wonder our mom and dad didn’t bother showing up, huh Remus, what a waste of time. You god damn disappointment. Maybe, if you apologize for being such an asshole, I’ll let you move back in once he’s finally bored of fucking you. Some times I wonder if our parents had fucking future sight when they got rid of you because they dodged one hell of a bullet.” Roman bit, looking right at his brother. Every word was meant to bite, deliberately chosen to get under the skin.

The energy in the room had dropped immediately, the crowd all in stunned silence. Remus's grin had disappeared, a look of wide eyed shock replacing it. Tears welling at the corner of his eyes. Next to him, Dolion looked torn between comforting his husband and jumping over the table to attack Roman. Roman almost wishes he would; he’d easily win that fight, deceit was whip-thin. He'd finally be able to wipe the smug look off that snake's face. His speech wasn’t over though; he still had time. 

Before he could start speaking again, he was grabbed by the back of the shirt and pulled harshly away from the mic. Roman stumbled back, surprised when he finds himself looking at a stern-faced Logan.

“What are you doing??” Roman asked.

“We are going back to the room.” He said. 

“Noooo, I’m not done,” Roman whined. 

“Yes, you are.” Logan said firmly. Then in a show of strength Roman didn’t know Logan had in him, he dragged Roman off the stage and out of the room.


	5. Burning toasters

“I’m going to kill him.” Deceit growled as he paced back and forth in front of his assistant. Remy leaned against the wall, watching his boss with his arms crossed.

“No, you won’t,” Remy said, and deceit rounded on him. Face twisted with rage.

“Oh, really, you think I won’t. After what he did. I swear to god, Remy, he’s dead.” Deceit’s voice was a low dangerous hiss, rage glinting in his eyes. Remy knew better than to treat it as An empty threat. He stood to his full height, looking earnestly at deceit.

“How’d you think he’d feel if he woke up after all that and his brother was gone,” Remy said, gesturing at the door across the room, in the silence that followed they could hear the gentle sounds of Remus’s sobbing. Deceits face softened, clearly longing to be back with his husband.

“He’d deserve it.” Deceit muttered, but all of the venom had drained from his voice. 

“You know that’s not how Remus thinks,” Remy said. Deceits shoulders slumped and he sighed, rubbing a hand over his face, pulling his eyepatch off in the process. When he next look at Remy, the anger seemed to have sucked from him, replaced by exasperated sadness.

“Yes... fine. God damn it. Get him the next flight out of here. I can’t be held responsible for what I’ll do if I see him again.” Deceit said. Remy nodded, pulling his phone out of his pocket and typing quickly. 

“The next US flight is leaving at 6:30 AM tomorrow. But it’s to Wisconsin.” Remy said less than a minute later.

“Perfect, I don’t care where he’s going as long as he’s gone.” Deceit said. 

“They're bought,” Remy said.

“Fantastic. Get those to the bastard and let him know I expect to be reimbursed, in full, for both his and his guests expenses. It’ll cost more than he makes in a year.” Deceit hissed happily, his blood lust partially sated at the prospect of keeping roman in debt. “Oh, and bring me one of the help, I’ll need them to get something set up for me.” 

“Mhm.” Remy nodded, not looking up from his phone as he sweeps out of the room.  
—-

Ten minutes later, the door to the master bedroom slowly opened, casting a sliver of light across the room, shining on to Remus’s curled up form, still shaking with silent sobs on the four-poster bed. 

“Remus.” Deceits soad softly. Remus shifted, keeping his face hidden in his arms. Not acknowledging his husband even as he sat down on the bed next to him. Deceit reached to gently rub a comforting hand across Remus back. “Oh, my love. Look at me, please.” Deceit whispered. After a few more shaking breath, Remus did. The moment he looked in to Dolion’s eyes he let out another sob and surged forward, wrapping his arms tight around Dolion and buried his face in his neck.

“H-he’s r-right, isn’t he? I’m awful.” He moaned miserably. Deceits grip tightened. A new spike of hot rage going through him.

“Do you think I’m going to leave you?” Deceit muttered into Remus's hair. Remus jumped, sitting up to stare in horror at deceit.

“Of course not!” Remus gasped. 

“He said I would. He’s wrong about that. Why would he be right about anything else.” Deceit reasoned, reaching up to place his hands on Remus's face, looking right into those bright green eyes. “I love you, Remus, Completely, and totally. Your the best thing that has or will ever happen to me. You ask me, I think he’s jealous, it’s obvious which one of you is better. He’s bitter about it.” Deceit said. Leaning over and kissing under Remus's eyes.

“Yeah?” Remus muttered, nuzzling into the hand on his cheek.

“Yeah. Why should we care what the sad sack thinks? Why should we care what anyone thinks? All that matter is that I love you, and you love me, and we’re going to take over the fucking world.” Deceit said. 

“Damn right,” Remus said weekly, his usual malicious glint flashing in his watery, bloodshot eyes. Deceits were once again struck by how beautiful Remus was. He surged forward and kissed him, gentle and sincere. Remus, as he always did, melted into it. They moved together like one being, a perfect, beautiful connection. Broken a few minutes later when they both came up for air.

“I’ve had a bonfire set on the beach, and our wedding presents were brought down. Let's go get drunk and burn some shitty presents.” Deceit suggested. Remus laughed, grinning brightly. 

“That sounds fantastic.” He said, letting deceit pull him off the bed and out the door.


	6. The end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This it it folks. The end of the road! Hope y’all enjoyed it, because it was so fun to write.

Roman was woken up at four AM by a pounding at the door. He moaned miserably, writhing on the bed. Head pounding with the worst hangover he’s had since college. 

“Go away!” He moaned, rolling over in the bed, eyes still firmly closed. 

“Don’t think so. Get up, or you’ll miss your plane roman.” A voice replied. Romans paused, completely confused.

“What?” He groaned. 

”fine have it your way,” the man on the other side of the door huffed. Then with the sound of jingling keys, the door swung open, revealing deceits bleach-blond assistant, looking miserably tired. 

“What are you doing!? You can’t just come in here!” Roman yelled, pulling the blankets up to his chest. 

“Yes, I can. After what you did, I’m shocked you're trying to make demands.” Remy said.

“What did I do?” Roman asked, suddenly worried. It wasn’t often that he got blackout drunk, but when he did, he usually ended up with something to apologize for. 

“You don’t remember?” Remy asked, a bright malicious grin spreading across his face. Roman suddenly fully understood how this man ended up so close to deceit. “Let me show you.” He said, flipping through his phone for a second before throwing it to Roman.

On the screen, Roman saw himself giving his speech. If he wasn't looking at it, he wouldn’t believe he’d done it. His words were so obviously meant to rip at his brother. Awful things that he only thought at his worst moments and had not once imagined he’d say directly to Remus. When his hate-filled speech ended, he watched Logan dragging him off stage. Then the camera flipped to the newlyweds. He saw Remus’s horrified eyes; tears flowing down his face. Saw the twisting rage of deceits face. Remus sobbed loudly, stood, and sprinted from the room, leaving his husband dumbstruck and upset. Dolions eyes flicked over to the camera and again contorted with rage. “Put that damn phone away before I break your fingers.” Deceit hissed, before standing and running after his husband. The video ended. leaving Roman staring at a black screen in absolute horror. 

“Oh-oh, my god,” Roman said shakily.

“Yup,” Remy said, popping the p. “You fucked up big time bud. Now the boss wants you out of here. So, take these and get packed.” He continued. Throwing the plane tickets on to Romans chest as he snatched his phone back. 

“I can’t believe I did that. I was so drunk. God, he must hate me.” Roman moaned.

“Probably. Your plane leaves at 6:30. But I’d leave before then; the boss wants your head on a spike. You won’t give him another reason if you know what’s good for you. Also You’ll be sent an invoice in the next two to three business days. As stated at the bottom the your invite, the Phineas’s can at any time revoke the complementary status of the trip, requiring you to pay in full. He’ll expect that from you. The first payment will be due by the end of the month.” Remy said frankly, then turned and left. Leaving Roman in a state of mortified shock.  
—  
A half an hour later, Roman had all his stuff together. There were only tickets for him, so presumably, Logan was allowed to stay. He’d given awkward goodbyes to him, during which Logan warned him that he probably shouldn’t talk to Joan and Thomas until everything calmed down. Another bridge his stupid, cruel mistake had burned. 

It was still dark when he got out of the room. Pulling his suitcases behind him as he walked towards the lobby in a miserable haze. Stopping to get out his phone when he got to the parking lot. He’d have to call a cab to the airport this time.

He’d just gotten off the phone with the taxi service when he felt something hit his back. he whipped around. He's not sure what he was planning to see, but it definitely wasn't his brother hanging by his knees out of a tree; a bird's nest clutched in one of his hand. Roman just stared in shock, and Remus stared right back. A few seconds later, Remus threw another thing at him. It wasn’t until it his forehead and broke that Roman realized it was a small bird's egg. Looking at the yolk that covered his hands after he tried to wipe it off, Roman couldn’t help but laugh. It was just so ridiculous that after all that, their Remus was, throwing birds eggs at him and grinning.

“I deserved that,” Roman said after a long pause. 

“Damn right, you did,” Remus said, and throw his third and final egg, which hit Roman in the chest.

“I-I’m sorry…” Roman muttered, looking anywhere but at his brother.

“For which part? Calling me a stupid whore, saying my marriage is a sham, or bringing up our parents?” Remus asked. Roman winced like he’d been punched, tears beginning to well in his eyes. He couldn’t believe he said all of that.

“All of it. I'm so, so sorry, Remus, what I did was … unforgivable.” Roman said, voice shaking.

“Okay, I forgive you!” Remus said happily. Roman spluttered, finally looking up at his brother, who was still hanging upside down, smiling his usual manic toothy grin. 

“You… you forgive me? Just like that?” Roman asked. He’d expects Remus to hate him, expected to be punched, to be yelled at, anything. Instead, Remus just shrugged casually and let himself drop out of the tree, landing in a heap on the ground.

“Course I do. I forgave you hours ago. Still nice to hear you apologize, though.” Remus said, rolling himself upright before standing and walking over to Roman. Roman was almost speechless; he could only think of one thing to say.

“Why?” Roman asked. Remus laughed brightly, looking at Roman like he was an idiot.

“We’re brothers dumby, why wouldn’t I forgive you. Don’t think Deedee sees it that way, though. I’d keep away from him if you want to keep all your limbs.” Remus said brightly, putting a hand on Romans' shoulder. This was so far from what Roman had been expecting he was at a complete loss for words.

“Thank you.” He said finally and pulled his little brother into a hug he sincerely felt he didn’t deserve.

“Totally! This just means me and Dee get to fuck up your wedding!” Remus said excitedly. Roman went wide-eyed. 

“I don’t know about that!” Roman said, shaking his head.

“Fairs fair bro. Your cars here, by the way.” Remus said, pointing behind Roman to the waiting taxi. 

“So it is… well, thank you again, Remus, for inviting me. Even if you're regretting it now.” Roman said.

“Shut up about it, dumbass; I told you you're forgiven, so stop thinking about it. See you at home!” Remus said, hugging Roman one more time before waving him off.

Roman was so confused and happy that he didn’t notice he was going to the complete wrong state until he was on the plane.

**Author's Note:**

> Comment and criticism welcome.


End file.
